While I thought I just momentarily was derailed, the vacation sapped me of my strength. Lost were those precious 3AM mornings and that stalwart of the 4AMs.

If I were to pick the seminal moment of failure, I would chiefly consider the simple shift from my carbonated water to diet sodas. Laboratory juice notwithstanding, I don't consider the nutrient contributions to impact things; rather, it's from a psychological perspective, that it shifted my view from food as a drug for healing to food as a release for pleasure-seeking. It was the slightest shift, but an insidious one.

Of course, another factor was being on a vacation: my daily schedule out of whack, and again...a context for pleasure. Instead of resisting the requests of the kids for the Chinese buffet, I relented and the subsequent food poisoning led me to seek the pleasure of food as a solace from the discomfort. Since then, my digestive system doesn't know how to handle all of these carbs, and despite seeking more food to resolve it...well, I have learned the hard lesson to move on from the sanctuary of food—at least, the low-nutrient variety.

I considered water fasting and gave it a few starts, but my failure in that activity in the early part of this year was a reminder that perhaps it was not the better recourse. I also wanted to parallel my fast that I did exactly six years ago, while in London, Prague, and Plzen, but...I did not want to live in the past or a reminder of things that could have been...not that I necessarily regret the choices I made since then; they were necessary. I just regret that I had to make them in the first place. If I were to retrace those initial steps via a fast, I would be reminded of the steps thereafter.

No, I don't live a life of six years ago. I turned 29 in Ireland; I turned 34 in the Czech Republic; days ago, I turned 40 in my home state of Tennessee, a place that I didn't think I'd ever have the opportunity to live in again—it seemed so far away.

In turning 40, it's not about looking back over the life I've lived and mimic it—hardly, there's a new frontier before me. Living a healthy lifestyle isn't for the reasons of twenty years ago. It's about longevity and resisting the suffering of entropy. Long we thought it was a thing of aesthetics, as if we could ever capture the magic of being 18 again. No, that is like the grasping of the wind.

No, I don't live a life of six years ago. I look toward to and dream of eternity. It is a longing, one that I cannot know what it is like...it is but a feeling, a feeling of longing that I've only had fallen shadows for comparison.

And as far as the practical, day-to-day approach: DEATH TO THE CARB! This water weight gain will slide right off once I re-establish myself into a low carb lifestyle. The Third Expedition may be shot, but I might still be able to pull out a victory with weight loss from this odious six-weeks yet—I just gotta cover 25 lbs in 26 days. 180 degree turns are among the biggest victories.

Yes, I have:

• What feels like a sprained right foot or a gnome raiding party made great strides in crippling my attack;
• A pulled muscle in my back, a vertebra out of alignment, or the vestige of the aforementioned gnomes' mirth spilling over onto my back as a dance floor;
• The lingering effects of food poisoning or those devilish gnomes have acquired the help of a potions master—you'd be surprised how much affection can be won from a pre-chewed slab of Bazooka gum;
• Suffered the effects of a sudden high-carb lifestyle or a rather portly gnome wearing an invisibility cloak clings perilously to my shoulders;
• Gained a lot of weight out of nowhere with a disillusionment that would cause lesser men to quit (bring me more bloodwine!).