When I wrote last, I was ignited with all the passion of a man completely onboard and excited as one chosen to belong to the kingdom of God—how ALIVE I felt! I did not see life as this mundane existence, tasked by a daily humdrum of digging dirt; rather, I saw each passing day as another step closer to the return of Jesus and all the joy thereafter! Experientially, those days leading into the new year felt good. I had an aggressive study of biblical truths in place into 2022 to coincide with all that I was experiencing. My vision for the year was in my development in becoming enriched by the things of God, a place where I could only accept humbly (with arms wide open, mind you) all of His riches while deserving ABSOLUTELY none of it.

As the weeks fell off 2022's calendar, I did not listen to as many John MacArthur sermons—I had already set aside the supplement content by other teachers. I did not view it as a red flag for I felt I was just too busy. For a time, I held fast to my Robertson's Unashamed podcast, but even those shallow waters faded away. I fell into a place where critical truths were no longer being spoken to me.

Soon thereafter, I dropped the rigors of my Bible commentaries reading followed by the eventual release of my daily Bible reading. Accordingly, my daily prayers were silenced. In this spiritually-starved vacuum, the truth was replaced by a lie. I attempted to quench my thirst with a distracting disdain against the world and all the political entanglements of a world shaped by little gods and their rebellion with blinded eyes and hardened hearts. In time, even that focus was set aside, as that old, vile triumvirate of the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes and the pride of life—that tired corruption of the Evil One—draped an ebony burial shroud across my face. I became no different than the world; I faltered with all of the covetous and anxieties from the thief who only knew "to steal and kill and destroy." Who was this god I worshipped? This image in the mirror was never to be exalted, but created to reflect...

...for I am not of this world. Jesus states in John 6:39, that it is the Father's will that Jesus should lose NOTHING of what was given to him by His Father, but that it will be raised up on that last day. So, He went out and got me back.

Today, I take comfort in places in the Bible like the entire chapter of Romans 8. I just kick myself for the lost opportunity of the first half of 2022.

I'm taking 2022's second half back.