I know it's August 6th. What's today's high gonna be? 97℉? I look at current events and my heart is heavy. THIS isn't the time to think of Christmas, is it? No blanket of snow, no fat ol' man in the sleigh, no savior in the food trough.

But, I want Christmas. Joy and goodwill. A big ol' Christmas that's gaudy with decorations, memories and bubble lights! A panoramic train set! And a HEAPING HELPING of all that classic Christmas music! Making memories for my kids like I had with my all-time favorite gift: Castle Greyskull!

Yes, I'm Dreaming of a White Christmas.

I'd say a thing or two about the yuletide snacks and eggnog, but ONLY because I am so burned out on sardines. Eating them now demands the willpower of an ab workout to get through that horrible fish! This morning was 3.8 oz and I didn't want to continue the second half. And it's just depressing that I've got another one queued up a couple of hours from now. Today marks the 13th day in a row in which they either were featured in my diet or were the only thing I ate. I wish I had a dog or cat to slip 'em to, though I don't suppose the added tsp of cayenne would go over well.

I know, I know: sardines are nutritious. I get that, I really do. And that new scale I've got says good things about me. I lost 3.6 lbs in five days which again, I lost 2 lbs in 42 days with 39E! But why must this be such a practice in asceticism?! Truly, I find water fasting more enjoyable! Cayenne and SARDINES annihilate appetite. But in application, coffee and butter do a better job.

As my high school Geometry teacher lambasted us, "Keep It Simple, Stupid." Though I prefer an approach to life of "Keep It Stupid—Simple!" Technically, I prefer a Ryan George "Keep It 'Super Easy—Barely An Inconvenience.'" KISEBAI, man, KISEBAI!

Truly though, just run with burger patties and bacon with the coffee drinks!

I turn my AccuRadio attention to 1990s Country. Ahh, Reba's Fancy (1990). Then there are these words that today's music has lost:

He'd never had given much thought to dancin'
But she gave a lot of thought to bein' asked
Well he'd never been good
At comin' right on out and askin'
And she'd never been given a chance
But somethin' moved across that old gym floor
When fear was hold'n fast
And to his surprise, the words came at last

Rhett Atkins, She Said Yes (1995)

Naw, I never changed; they moved on. 90s country sounds good like it ever was. I'm still the me from then. I don't know if that genre gets much better than Alabama and—OH, and Garth Brooks' Ropin the Wind album, specifically What's She's Doin' Now (1991), something I've never heard from a streaming service until now. That reminds me of being 14 and 15 again with a Tim McGraw "A heart don't forget something like that" (1999).

While it was 30 years ago, just 'cause the world's gone done gone crazy, don't mean I gotta be. As for me regarding this "new" world, I "pop a top again" 'cause as Clint Black twanged, "Somehow we sell ourselves on love, I just don't think I'll believe my heart this time" (1992).

Cause a row of fools on a row of stools
Is not what's on my mind
But then you see her leaving me
It's not what I prefer
So, it's either here just drinkin' beer
Or home remembering her

Pop a top, again
I think I'll have another round
Set em' up my friend
Then I'll be gone
And you can let
Some other fool sit down

Alan Jackson, Pop a Top (1999)