"Can’t You Smell That Smell...the Smell of Death Surrounds You"

That run with Scentbird did not last long! My take: they have one thing to do: they do not make the cologne; they just do logistics. I made my order on Saturday. I figured by Monday, I would see status updates as to where it was en route. Reasonable?

Well, Tuesday came around and all I had was a shipping label printout. I might of just toughed it out until I ran across this Reddit thread.

*sigh*

So be it.

At this stage of my life, I'm interested more in designing my own cologne as I did years ago with beard oil. But, I've got my ol' standby vendor whom I delight in if I want to go branded. That said, when was the last time I cared about a brand? When it mattered to be "cool," I did not care about cool. Why would I now? I'm happy to be 46 and be...well...ME!

"There's Always Something There to Remind Me"

Why did I sign up with Google again? It wasn't for YouTube curation; I'm happy with my Feedly implementation. I don't use Google's search engine. Its take on AI blows monkey chunks. In general, email these days is just a place to house spam, webhost notifications, and delivery updates—somehow I went from having humanity in my life to having computers as friends. LibreOffice is a superior choice for a desktop suite. And Google sniffs through your stuff for anything you put on their hard drive.

So why do I do it?

Oh yeah, for a phone. I use Google so as to not cripple my phone. The thing is, I hold a dummy phone in higher regard than this, "Is this really smart?" nonsense. However, I own this Samsung Galaxy so it is free to keep around.

Why do I have a phone? Not for music, not to track steps, but in case a meteorite falls from the sky and obliterates my car...so I can then take a picture. Isn't it funny that there's a societal expectation that we carry around a smart phone...or even have a mobile number? When I gave up everything and just ran a Skype number in the '00s, two-factor authentication via SMS was not as prevalent and still there were times I had to pound my head against a wall.

I fully intend to never own a smart phone again in my life. Who wants a computer with no keyboard with a display that's basically the size of an index card? That's just dumb.

So the tech comes up empty-handed and Google's progressive garbage leaves an empty heart.

Naw, you can count me out on that.

When I broke away from Google, I took the best step forward. Paying Tuta for my email host was the right play to make.

"We Didn't Start the Fire"

I gotta take a step back—nay, run SCREAMING in the other direction away from the news, especially in this season where emotional arguments win the day and make up the platform of leadership. This is no place for the INTJ.

Things are gonna happen and there's nothing I can do. But, then there's another thing: do politics have anything to do directly with me? People yammer on expecting it to matter with me, but in many ways, I am like the United Kingdom, the U.S. can jack up their economy without them having a "vote" (as if votes ever mattered).

Still, there's something more: does it all have a meaningful impact upon my life? I am supposed to invest all of this mental activity in dancing at a party for an elephant or a donkey, whereas I embrace...

Take off your armor, friend of mine
I have no arrows, but I got time
All your sorrow keeps you glued to your seat
Can we get you out of your head and into your feet?
And it's not that the rest of us don't have the blues
It's just that some dance partners need a dance partner, too
Is that you?

-The Midnight, Dance with Somebody (2020)

Does anything they do show up when I embrace the Sun, expand my lungs with the air of a new day, and become fully alive? Do they matter to you when you're the most alive, the most like whom you were always meant to be?

I find folks want power. They are disinterested in how you are really doing. That's why I'm for an EXTREMELY downsized government and industries. Small towns have smaller governments. Global hegemonies suck.

I suspect the more stuff we have (or have hope in the potential thereof), the less free we are.

It is unfortunate how we ignore the ones who love us the most and heed people who do not care whether we live or die, whether models and brands; ideologues and tech; or politicians and governments.

Silence is not the way
We need to talk about it
If heaven is on the way
We'll wrap the world around it
If heaven is on the way
If heaven is on the way
I'm a stranger in this town

-Bush, Letting the Cables Sleep (1999)

Now that I'm below 200 lbs, I've upped my spice game. I changed my rub to a 1:1:2 ratio, instead of a 2:2:1, for a total of 20 tbs of cayenne pepper into my mix. Unfortunately, I gotta earn other spices to move beyond my Whatta Man pillars (salt and pepper).

This morning, I put a ¼ tsp of the rub on one side of the patty and then flipped it over and did the same. My 2-patty breakfast with 2.3 oz of bacon was STUFFING! That spice rub is the appetite killer. But, to be fair, I did have my two cups of coffee with a stick-and-a-half butter. Plus, I added back a half tbsp of bacon fat to each 85/15 burger. I'll have another coffee later for the today with just a couple of tablespoons of butter and I'm DONE for the day: 222 / 71 / 0.6. Yes, I even track my spices: 1 tsp = 0.5 carbs.

My traps are sore today, which amuses me because I just doddled around yesterday morning. I only did 3 of the planned 5 sets of incline rows because my breastbone just felt like it was gonna cave in.

After that, I then just amused myself with shrugs and crank out a few bicep curls. It was totally not my old approach! I'll get better.

However, I did manage to welcome the night with arms wide open at 4 AM even though my stamina slept in.

This morning was nothing because my alarm clock / workout buddy, Garmin Forerunner 935, had its watchband snap in half as I slept? I guess I finally learned to sleepwalk those steps in! But, I've got a velcro update coming in today. When it comes in, I'll train, though I want to put work in that's optimal, objective, succinct, and with purpose. I get the sense that workouts become a flurry of activity just 'cause everyone else is doing it.

We don't ask those questions of why. Like ellipticals—what exactly am I training—other than for a move to Norway. And what about the holy grail of squats with a barbell? Where is the life application for THAT? It's just not a wrench I need in my toolbox. Asian squats however...sign me up for those this week!

My development ranking?

1. Movement
2. Pliability
3. Strength

...or roughly in DnD/WoW terms: Constition / Stamina; Dexterity / Agility; and Strength.

There is something about a Saturday night. It draws me back to nearly three decades ago, to yesteryear. It's a kind of magic, something with hints of adventure. I feel it again; I am on the verge of something exciting.

I signed up for the cologne subscription service, Scentbird. While the idea has been in my head for months, I pulled the trigger after watching another Matt video, Great Value Freezer Section vs. The Real Thing. My queue:

July

1. Tommy Bahama's Maritime Triumph - pimento berries, cedar leaf, cashmere wood, violet leaves, mandarin oil
2. Confessions of a Rebel's Better Than Your Ex - black pepper, apple, Italian lemon, lavender, sandalwood

August

1. Tru Western's Yellowstone Ride - raw bergamot, crisp clary sage, smoked whiskey, charred vanilla, rough cut tobacco
2. Room 1015's Ten Fifteen - sandalwood, mandarins, saffron, iris, violet

I nearly went with Verasce's Eros again; but, I've worn that scent so there's no discovery. I would like to explore its leather colognes.

Perhaps big picture, it matters none as to what I wear. But, I cannot deny that it makes me feel good. This fragrance fellowship also coincides to the very beginning of 2021 as I was still in the country, seeing the changes ahead and grasping toward places on the scale I hadn't been since...music was good. As I would later write in that year:

NOW on THIS day in history, I weigh in under 200 lbs. At 197.5, I am the lightest I have been in 16 years! And five of those years had me well above the 300 lb mark!

It's surreal to finally return to this place—it's like I hitched a ride on the DeLorean.

August 12, 2021

Just think about it: just last week, I weighed in at 199. How do I feel?

I'm a man on fire
Sounds crazy but I never lose
Oh you know I'm gonna give it
All I got do what i came to do
I'm a man on fire
And my day is overdue
This burn is never gonna stop
Do what I came to do
I'm a man on fire

Oh the Larceny, Man on Fire (2018)

My workouts kick off tomorrow to make a push toward that NYR golden ratio.

Along with the return of training, on Saturday, I returned to two things, the ever-inspiring BACON, you'll recall these musical blog post titles:

1. The 29E Weigh-in: "Bacon, I Was Made For Lovin' You"

2. "...but It Ain't No Lie, Baby, Buy Buy Buy"

3. "Bacon, You're Simply the Best, Better Than All the Rest"

4. "All Around the World, Bacon Crumbles for Me. Who Knows How Long I've Loved You?"

5. "All You Bacon Can't You See, Can't You See, How Your Love's Affecting My Vitality"

6. "The Things You Weigh—Cure Unbelievable!"

7. "Here Come the Bacon Fat, Meat Won't Let You Remember..."

8. "I Got That Bovine on My Docket, Got That Bacon on My Sheet"

9. "I Wanna Really, Really, Really Wanna Cure-A-Pig, Ah"

10. Harbor Freight Trip 01 of 2023: "I Wish I Cooked Ribeye Into a Stir Fry...I Want to Fry Away"

11. "I've Flamed Every Grill I Suppose...Bacon, I Have Found, I Get Lost in You"

12. "Test Your Might. Chortle Porkfat! Bite!"

13. "Turn the Beef to Brown, Love to Seer My Obsession"

14. "When It's Over, That's the Time I Maul and Shove Bacon."

15. "So Tonight, I Wanna Hearty Steak—It's Dine Scene Mighty Fine!"

16. "Do Want to Choose It. It’s a Salt Lick! Bacon Woogie, Woogie!"

17. "Plumper to Plumper, the Barbecue’s Stacked...Thrice Spice, Maybe? Too Bold! Chew Gold."

18. "I Won't Apply Part, Hibachi à la Carte. Adjust Donut—Sink It in the Sand!"

19. "Fruit Carbohydrate Win—A Plied Girth Score Chart, Not Loss in the Game"

20. "And I’m Too Messy for My Lamb, Too Messy for Bacon in Jackson or Milan—I Like to Gobble, You Know What I Mean?"

21. "There's a Fryer Goin' on Right Here, an Immolation to Fast Chew All the Steers"

22. "Bacon Come Back...I Was Wrong and I Just Can't Live Without You"

There's just may be underlying love for bacon there!

And then there is 2018's passion for cayenne. In 2018, I took supplements of it and 2019, I had my dehydrated spinach, brocoli, and flaxseed cracker-abominations covered with the stuff. I had AI drum up a ratio for black pepper : salt : cayenne for a burger rub: 2:2:1. I scooped out 10 tablespoons of black pepper, 10 of Redmond's course salt (I still have probably around 24 lbs from this purchase), and added 5 tbsps of cayenne.